I still love my ex. Should I feel this way?

405 Answers
Last Updated: 04/06/2019 at 5:53am
I still love my ex. Should I feel this way?
★ This question about Breakups was starred by a moderator on 5/12/2016.
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Top Rated Answers
coffeemanbren2
August 16th, 2015 3:29pm
sure. theres nothing wrong with it. you've shared experiences, you've been intimte, yu've been vulnerable, you given and probably recieved trust. all things that humans crave. a lot of people spend their lives trying to feel those things and once experienced its natural to want to keep feeling them.
Milfath
March 19th, 2016 10:36pm
Why not? is there something wrong with that? love is a spontaneus sensation,it's completely normal!
TeenWolf
March 24th, 2016 3:42pm
Yes but only for a period of time if your over do It and keep your love for he/she then this would be called love addiction
Anonymous
March 25th, 2016 7:34pm
Everyone has hard times, and can't get over someone. It takes a while for love to stop, considering on who ended it first.
Bettershapes
April 22nd, 2016 5:03pm
You are definitely allowed to feel this way, it took me 4 years to finally get over my boyfriend. It seems like the end of the world and that things wont change, but they will and they do. Eventually you will stop noticing him, you'll stop caring about what he's posting on social media, and you wont want to talk to him anymore. You wont miss him. I don't know if you ever really do stop loving him, but you'll learn to deal with it, and accept it and he wont matter anymore. There's a reason he isnt in your life anymore. He's gone now, so that someone better can come along. It may be the hardest thing in the world to see right now, but there is someone better out there for you. There will always be someome better than the last. I promise.
ongubsy
December 26th, 2015 4:21pm
of course you can feel this way. you probably shared lots of things together. but do you say its definitely love not routine?
Anonymous
March 17th, 2016 1:52pm
From previous experience you will also find feelings from previous relationships. Also look forward.
sunnycappuccino
March 19th, 2016 9:24am
I don't think you can ever stop loving people ... feelings don't start and stop automatically ... embrace it with gratefulness but know that you can live and still love without him/her .. good luck ....
notnovember12
March 25th, 2016 2:08am
Every feeling you have is valid. Feeling love for them is okay. I just hope that you're finding good and healthy ways to cope with those feelings. Stay positive!
Dariana
March 25th, 2016 9:02pm
Yes. You shared some feeling and they were true you cant just get over it. But it will eventualy pass but it is totaly normal.
heyitsveraxoxo
March 25th, 2016 10:55pm
It's quite normal to continue to feel attraction toward an ex, especially if they broke up with you. The important part is that you gradually get stronger and don't consume yourself with thoughts of what "could've been". Hope it works out for you.
Anonymous
June 5th, 2016 9:31am
It's alright to love somebody even if they are your ex, caring for someone you had relations with is natural for us humans. Feeling that way is very normal.
thatswhereillbewaiting
August 21st, 2016 9:10am
i don't believe there's a right or wrong way to feel.. break ups can be rough and leave you feeling all sorts of things. take it day by day and it is true, time heals all wounds!
devinacares
October 4th, 2016 10:46am
That is completely normal to feel this way. Have you talked to your ex about the way you feel? If things ended badly then perhaps you could work on placing this love into your own self rather than externally. it's completely normal to feel this way.
Matchschtick
December 5th, 2016 8:09pm
There is no right way of feeling in such a situation, but it is likely that it will take some time after a break-up to "stop loving" that particular ex. In my own experience, that process will take some time to get used to no longer being with that person.
JNBH1511
April 1st, 2018 11:47pm
Love is unlimited. You’ll never know how much love you’re able to give and especially to feel. It’s normal to feel this way, to still love someone even after days, months or years go by. And it may fade way or maybe it won’t. You can’t change your feelings, but you can learn to let go. I still love this silly boy. I met him when I was only thirteen. I barely knew what love was and I certainly did not know what it can do to you. Many years later I still love him. He still crosses my mind every once in a while and I still compare him to every guy I meet. You know, loving him isn’t wrong. I would still date that cute guy I saw in Starbucks today, I would still spent that long summer night kissing the boy I chased for twee weeks in Spain and I would definitely marry the guy who loves me more than anything. Love is unlimited. And you need to accept the love you feel for someone you can no longer have. Learn to let go and you WILL find happiness again.
anikri
September 12th, 2014 8:16pm
It is completely natural to feel this way after a break up. I felt the same way when my boyfriend of two years broke up with me.
Tameka
September 29th, 2014 10:25pm
There is nothing wrong with still having feelings for someone that you used to be in a relationship with. Being completely over someone takes time.
Anonymous
October 18th, 2014 6:21am
I think a more valid question would be ... 'Do I feel this way?' ... because you are trying to heal and help Yourself and what you feel must be considered rather than ... what is the so-called norm , And it's okay to still love your ex... but you'll have to establish some boundaries to heal and move on
Kathlyng90
October 24th, 2014 11:53pm
You cannot control who you love, so it isn't about if you should or should not feel this way. You have to look at it and think if she is the right person to love. I assume there is a valid reason they are your ex... take a look at that maybe.
RYBH
October 27th, 2014 12:51am
It depends. Everyone experiences everything very differently. So it really is a personal thing on you.
Anonymous
July 2nd, 2015 9:57am
There is no on-off switch to love. Just as LGBT individuals cannot choose their sexuality (not that there is anything wrong with being LGBT), individuals such as you cannot choose whom you fall in love with. Most often, ex-boyfriends and ex-girlfriends are from your past, and having loved them before, it is very nearly a habit for you to love them. You therefore have great difficulty not loving them still after they have left you. There is nothing wrong with it, nor is there a 'should' or 'should not' to it. If you must, you must. There is a kind of moving on in which your love for your ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend does not fade, but you will always feel a kind of emotion towards them. That is all right, too. It is psychologically healthy. Worry not, and good luck to you in your love life!
MagicalPond86
July 9th, 2015 8:37am
I dont feel like its a matter of should or shouldnt, you can love an ex for the rest of your life, however you need to respect that they dont want to be in the relationship anymore, perhaps you need grieve the relationship so that you are able to move on and love others in the future. leave a soft spot for this person, but find a way to live so that your happiness does not depend on someone who couldnt return the same deep feelings
Itsacrazylifewelive
July 9th, 2015 3:50pm
It'a completely acceptable to still love and care for your ex. Humans feel and in feeling we get attached to others. Attachments are not so easily broken. To be honest, you can still love your ex and even move on with life and love another. Especially if that individual is your first love.
butterflykisses27
July 11th, 2015 5:56am
Its perfectly normal if you have been with someone and you loved them and the relationship ends you will still feel love for that person. Every person we meet in life leaves some kind of imprint on us. Some more than others. Especially those we have been intimate with and or shared part of our lives and our thought and deepest emotions. Its perfectly normal.
OCDLena
July 22nd, 2015 4:28pm
You can't control your feelings, you can only control how you act upon them. It is perfectly fine that you still love your ex, but that doesn't mean that you have to go back out with him
Anonymous
July 26th, 2015 9:23am
It is okay to still love your ex. Just please be sure to love yourself first and keep in mind that moving on could be better for you.
Anonymous
August 13th, 2015 3:41am
There is certainly nothing wrong with it, I felt I still loved my ex for some time before finally moving on.
Anonymous
August 16th, 2015 7:31pm
Maybe you aren't just quite ready for moving on. And that's okay, just don't rush yourself to "fall out of love"
Anonymous
August 17th, 2015 5:31am
Well. Some people do and some people don't. If they're you ex then they had to be your gf/bf at one time. So you would have had to love them at some point to be with them.