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How to talk to a therapist without your parents knowing?

234 Answers
Last Updated: 06/04/2022 at 5:56pm
How to talk to a therapist without your parents knowing?
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Tracy-Kate Teleke, PsyD, M.A., LMFT

Marriage & Family Therapist

I assist adults and couples in CA experiencing relationship challenges and interpersonal struggles including anxiety, depression, and a myriad of other life challenges.

Top Rated Answers
Crest
January 14th, 2016 3:38am
If you want to do that, you should be ready to pay out of your own pocket. Why you would want to, though, is beyond me.
Zohaash
March 11th, 2016 4:10pm
well this site is perfect for you then, you can talk to me or any other listener, we would be glad to help!
peacefulPond74
February 2nd, 2016 2:50pm
There are online therapists, or you can go to your GP and ask them to refer you to a therapist (they cant tell your parents anything). However, i have found that family support is important, and the best approach is to be very honest with your parents about your feelings.
LeightonHarrington
March 13th, 2016 8:43am
A school councillor is always a good place to start, and if you ask them to, they will keep everything completely confidential :)
Anonymous
January 27th, 2016 3:31pm
if you want to keep it to yourself that you are talking or seeing your therapist, that is ok! I would recommend telling your therapist this is your intention, find a quiet place to talk or speak, and if your parents ask where you were or doing, just say your with a friend talking .
Truckerwife08
January 22nd, 2016 1:01am
Depends on your age. And there are laws depending on your country that can keep people from finding out your business reguarding health
FrenchToast
February 15th, 2016 3:08pm
Most schools have counselors for this. If you don't like, or aren't comfortable, or aren't in school, there are always virtual therapists who are safe, legit and trustworthy, for who give you services online; or maybe an online helpline service can also be equally helpful. Feel better!
Thearrow
March 20th, 2016 10:42pm
Easy! Come to 7cups of tea and have your "own" therapist here! We are here to help you! Or...... go to your school therapist, or ask help to any adult you trust! :)
Aprildays2432
January 31st, 2016 12:09am
It would be pretty difficult visiting a therapist without your parents knowing. Since you have to pay for a therapist or get one through health care your parents would have to know. It probably would also be better for you emotionally to let your parents know, you don't have to give them any specifics though.
AnnaPlusAHusky
April 11th, 2018 4:25pm
Generally speaking, it is very helpful for parents to know if their child is struggling and needs help, however, it is important to also validate that not all parents will be open to their children seeking therapy. If the child has a source of income to be able to afford copays or sliding scale therapy, they can seek out therapy on their own either online, by phone, or locally if they have a means of transportation. Reaching out to a trusted friend or relative for help is also a wise idea if the child is certain that his or her parents would reject the idea of therapy. Once in session, therapy is confidential and it’s important for children and adults alike to know that what they discuss in therapy remains confidential at all times and cannot be discussed with parents or accessed by any outside party without signed permission from the client. Exceptions to this in the United States are programs that use a team treatment protocol, in which case information may be discussed only with other therapists on the team or when clients have active plans to carry out suicide, homicide, or if there is an active threat or suspicion of a current threat of abuse or neglect to a minor child.
Rorschak
January 31st, 2016 7:34am
Everything that you say to your theripest is confidential. They are not allowed to speak to your parents about anything related to your sessions together. However, it you are in danger of hurting yourself or others, they will have to report it to someone who can help and inform your parents
mike251
January 29th, 2016 3:11am
You go to therapy. By law, therapists cannot tell anyone what you say in therapy, unless you give them permission.
soulglitch
March 26th, 2016 1:07am
Ask your therapist or the person you are seeking a referral to is to request to keep it confidential.
calmHeart16
January 23rd, 2016 4:06pm
Either seek online, call their clinic or go to the nearest hospital by yourself or with a friend if it makes you feel better.
Anonymous
February 1st, 2016 1:15am
You can contact a hotline, and they will be able to offer you support and advice. 7cups is very therapeutic to some as well!
Anonymous
April 26th, 2020 10:38pm
I've been there! I talked to an online therapist because it's easier to hide. I used to take money for "going out with friends", but instead I'd use it to pay for therapy. It was actually surprising how useful online therapy was. I was suicidal back then, and it really helped me control my anxiety and depression. I'm forever grateful for that experience. I think it's one of the main reasons why I'm on 7 Cups, despite the fact that it was about four years ago. I encourage everyone to seek help, no matter how hard and desperate things seem.
bluehorizons
May 4th, 2018 9:02pm
A great start is here at 7 cups. We have online therapists that are eager to help and certified. Also a school counselor or human resource at work is a great way to open up and get the help you need.
StayStrong6
February 1st, 2016 2:56pm
I think it’s good if you could share your feelings with your parents and let them know what you want to do and they can help you out. But if not, then why don’t you try out online websites where there are online therapists who can help you out. You may have to pay for the professional ones.
XKangaotiCX
April 13th, 2018 9:09pm
In almost all schools they provide a school counsellor, whom you can talk all of your issues to but the quality of them can vary, and they aren't always confidential. You could start by making sure they understand that the effectiveness of their job is based on you feeling like they can be trusted with your confidence.
incarnadinepetals
March 17th, 2016 11:08pm
If you're under the age of 18, it is very hard. You can always talk to your guidance counselors about your problems at school
Anonymous
March 20th, 2016 9:04am
Sometimes your school has a program or a counselor available to their students- I remember my elementary and high schools having several counselors available to their students, all under complete privacy.
BatWings89
January 15th, 2016 3:01pm
That really depends on your age and country, so I'm not able to give you exact details. Try to contact your countries helpline for children. They will be able to help you with such specific questions.
LyricalTruth
April 2nd, 2020 11:11am
Well there is always the online therapy outlets, and school counselors if you are an educational facility. If you are in college, many of them offer counseling services to students paid for by your tuition. There is also crisis helplines. But depending on why you feel you need to speak with a therapist, I suggest on communicating why you feel you can't tell your parents, or want to do therapy without their knowledge. Support is important, but I do understand why someone would want to keep their therapy session private. With that being said, doing whatever is best for your well being is important, however you feel you need to go about it.
Anonymous
January 16th, 2016 4:20pm
I have gone though this myself and I was a seven cups of tea user seeking advise before becoming a listener, I also went to group chats online and of your over 18 any therapist will see you without a parental agreement
Anonymous
April 15th, 2018 8:47am
There is actually an online therapist here within the website here (http://www.7cups.com/online-therapy/) ... best of luck :D
katieee1234
October 6th, 2019 10:37pm
You can talk to a school counselor. As long as you aren't coming across as very suicidal, they will not tell your parents anything, especially if you ask them not to. They are required to keep your confidentiality, as long as they don't feel you will harm yourself or others. You can schedule a time to talk to your counselor at lunch, before school, or after school. I'm pretty sure you can even schedule times during classes, if nothing else will be able to work for you. All you have to do is go into the office and ask for a request slip.
warmPudding59
July 4th, 2018 9:37pm
Look up the lowest age for confidentiality or ask the therapist before a session or at first contact and they can inform you.
ToastableTbd
March 23rd, 2016 3:58pm
Look for a free online therapist or talk to a qualified therapist website. They might be able to help without your parents knowing.
Anonymous
June 14th, 2018 12:13pm
You can contact a local therapist. Since "the law protects the confidentiality of all communications between a client and psychotherapist" you can feel safe that they won't tell anyone whatever you share with them. You can ask them not to tell your parents and they should respect your desire.
greatfulRainfall46
July 24th, 2020 5:28am
this depends on you location of residence. Some therapy locations won’t allow children of a certain age services without their parents consent. my location of residence has the age at 12 for some locations and 16 at others. You can always talk to the therapist and see if they are willing to make arrangements that don’t involve your parents. As well, many schools offer therapist specialists so you could always ask the office or a trusted teacher to be connected with them:)! It does get a little tricky trying to make the appointments so that your parents aren’t involved, so i go suggest if possible just let your parents know you intend on doing this so they can assist with travel. however if this is not a possibility you could see what type of transportation is available to you