Moderated by
Jennifer Patterson, LMFT
Art Therapist
Life can be messy. Sometimes you need a little support to make your way through it. I love to help guide people through their challenges & to find the beauty in our messes.
Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
May 20th, 2016 4:44pm
People tell you all these bad things about you, that you start to believe them. You have no self respect. No self-confidence. Or anything in that line. You are the only one who can change you, so change what you hate about yourself, if you can't accept it, don't try to change what already is.
People are usually more hard on themselfs then others so just relax and think about your positive traits and if you think that you have none than make yourself like you want yourself to be. You can make yourself whatever you want only if you work hard
You may hate yourself if you are not confident in yourself or if you don't have a good support system. Remember we are all very important in life and we all have a purpose, you just have to find that purpose and sometimes that is not easy and takes a lot of soul searching!
Hatred is something we feel at some points in our lives. Mostly we find someone else to blame and hate for something that happened. But there are cases where one gets stuck in the idea that they are the problem in everything and this is the point where self-hatred begins. There are several mental illnesses which make this feeling even stronger or hold back from seeing the good again. It's okay to be critical with oneself but it's not healthy to hate the most important person in one's life.
Anonymous
October 23rd, 2016 8:10am
In my experience, hating oneself is the result of spending so much time engrossed with your own thoughts that you forget to spend time helping other people.
Anonymous
October 12th, 2016 10:14pm
Because you just see the bad things in you. Try to see the good things and keep smiling once a day!
Honestly...sometimes we all reach a point where we have low self-esteem. Even the listeners the only reason you hate yourself are a couple of things your insecure and notice your flaws..youve made a mistake(s)..and you regret it....you get discouraged..etc. We all have our own reasons. Mine is sometimes still now I'm always dissapointed in myself and ive been able to change that. Ive worked really hard avoid music that can trigger you about flaws or problems you kinda realize that no ones perfect but people have a different way of showing it.
Anonymous
July 14th, 2018 2:57pm
1) because you have an internal nature where you compare....with others...therefore you think others are doing better and hence hate yourself.
2) because you have a critical nature....which is always picking faults...faults of others...faults you see in yourself.
May be you hate yourself because you blame yourself for everything that happens in your life. You oversee your good qualities and focus on your bad ones may be so that you can improve them but fail which makes you hate yourself more. You are the one who can tell correctly why you hate yourself so much and change it.
You are still here. Do something that makes you feel good. Talk to the people that love you, maybe figure out why others care about you. Even if its hard to care about yourself. I do not know why you hate yourself. But I believe you can find out why others don't. Perhaps there is not so much to hate after all.
Anonymous
November 22nd, 2017 3:53pm
I am sorry that you cannot see your value. I don't know you, but I can assure you that you are valuable and wonderful. You should discuss your feelings with your parents and trusted friends. If this continues, you should see a counselor or a professional. You are worthy and should feel safe and comfortable in your own skin.
Anonymous
November 10th, 2017 6:20pm
You can hate yourself so much if you do something you know you will regret, had a bad day or have a condition that resulted in the actions you may have took but tried to prevented.
Anonymous
August 20th, 2017 4:02pm
You may be feeling guilty for something you have done in the past which might have affected someone physically or mentally. Not to worry, its never to late to realize our mistakes. Realization is the first step towards positivity and success.
Perhaps you're dealing with low self esteem and a negative self image. These can be worked on by developing a more positive outlook through positive self talk, working through any issues you have (i.e depression/anxiety) and by developing a better self image in general, and learning to love yourself.
Self-loathing is common for all of us. There's always a point in everybody's life where they hate themselves. It is because, we tend to ignore all the positivity in ourselves and only focus on the negativity instead. The most helpful way of overcoming it is to learn to love yourself. See the light of positivity in you, that you won't be able to see until you get off that blindfold of looking at you through other's perspectives. No one can know you better than yourself, remember that.
As someone that suffers from that as well, I don't really know why we do. When you look at it, most of the time there are things that we like about ourselves, they're just not important enough to us to outweigh the things we hate. Learning to love yourself is one of the hardest things someone can learn to do, but the best way to do it is to surround yourself with people that love you and work on the things that you CAN change about yourself, and become someone you love using the support of your loved ones and the desire to be better.
Half the time we dont hate ourselves, but hate the situations we are in. Sometimes if we change things around us that make us happy, we realize that we dont hate ourselves but hated the situation we were in.
I am my biggest critic and worst enemy. I have done things in my life that cause me to carry around great shame. But, I am learning to love myself again!
Sometimes people are hyper critical of themselves. It's a normal thing but it's highly detrimental to your overall mental health. You should try to start thinking of yourself the way your friends do. If you think something mean about yourself just ask "would my friend say this to me?"
People's minds and bodies are like words; if you think or look at them for too long they look weird. Respect yourself in a way you wold respect a celebrity or a loved one. You are the only person you need in your life; love and cherish yourself. You will be better at something than someone else and someone else will be better at something than you are but that doesn't make you any less amazing. We're all only human, we live in our bodies and we should love them.
Anonymous
October 20th, 2016 11:38am
I do not hate myself. I might hate myself only when I messed up and do not do what I have set out to do. It is all about being insecure about myself.
you didn't know how to love yourself and the only thing you want to remember is to live yourself first and next anybody.stop analysing yourself with negative thoughts.just remember " your inner world determines your outer world"
Anonymous
July 13th, 2016 2:59pm
It is because your mind has become habituated in amplifying your negatives, and nullifying your positives. Try the 7 cups guides on Managing Emotions, Grief, Anxiety, Depression, Lonliness, Panic Attacks..................................also others to learn some nice strategies of dealing with negative thinking. You may not find them anywhere else.
Hating yourself is normally caused by the constant need to compare yourself to others. When you compare yourself to people who are 'prettier', 'fitter', or 'richer' than you, it can lower your self esteem immensely.
Maybe you don't quit understand yourself yet. Expand your figure of yourself, make yourelf what you want to be. You'll start seeing how much less there is to hate than to love.
You hate yourself so much possibly because you are not living up to your expecations and they may be too high for you. Also, it could be from negative self talk and poor self esteem.
To answer your question, I would recommend you to join a support chat room or message any of listeners from 7cups.
Because you aren't where you wish to be in life yet
Anonymous
December 20th, 2017 3:26am
Because sometimes it's hard to see what is so great about yourself. Sometimes people or even your own mind makes you think so poorly of yourself, it's hard to change that mindset.
This is easy... when I look in the mirror or the people around me, I can only see the imperfections. I'm chubby with a baby face that makes me look like a permanent 12 year old all the time. I've got a stomach. Acne. Oily nose. no boyfriend. Inability to feel anything. Commitment issues to things like work, projects, or routine (like working out). Disappointment to everyone around me. Especially to myself.
Everything sucks around me because I suck. And if I can't control anything around me, I feel helpless. But at least I can choose to hate myself.
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