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Why do I hate myself so much?

262 Answers
Last Updated: 03/31/2021 at 11:30pm
Why do I hate myself so much?
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Brenda Munroe, LCSW

Clinical Social Work/Therapist

As a Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW), I have worked with individuals of all ages. My work with clients is supportive, interactive and nonjudgmental.

Top Rated Answers
May 25th, 2016 7:41pm
Because you're not able to make peace with everything you are yet. Maybe because of your past or because of things that happened to you... you need to learn how to love and accept yourself but that takes time...some may never achieve it...
May 26th, 2016 3:49pm
I understand that you hate yourself. But you have to ask yourself: "Do I myself because I really do or do I hate myself because others do?" Then you should think about what you love about yourself. You will see that this is a lot more than the things you hate. It may take time to find those things and see them but you have the time!
May 26th, 2016 8:02pm
You may have done something that made you feel guilty about what you did. Talk to someone it will help.
May 28th, 2016 10:51am
It might be helpful to combat the negative voice, talk back to it and tell it that it's wrong! You are worth feeling better!
June 1st, 2016 5:29am
hi my friend hatting our self becz we love other one more or we care the other person more its good to care other one but hatting yourself will make you weak and negative energy will affect you more try to change your thinking share your views spent more time in those thing which u love to do meet all those ppl who inspire you who try to help u come in this site share your views we all will help you just have patience my friend all will good.
June 1st, 2016 11:18am
Because you couldn't find something in yourself. Go and treasure yourself because something special in you is hidden somewhere.
June 1st, 2016 6:41pm
I am so sorry you feel that why about yourself. We all have our doubts and insecurities. What are three things you like about yourself?
June 1st, 2016 11:21pm
I guess the reason is why I hate myself so much is because I try so hard to fit it & no matter what I do it feels like people hate me. I feel ugly but when people say I'm pretty I just don't see it.
June 2nd, 2016 7:14pm
Because you compare yourself with others in all issues and you will blame your self for others inability remember ! In this entire world there is no bond for anything everything goes on rising there is no dead line for anything so, you are superior ultimately.
June 2nd, 2016 11:50pm
Thats a question you have to ask yourself.. you have to learn and love yourself no matter the flaws.
June 3rd, 2016 4:52pm
Hating yourself is something that many people struggle with, including myself. It can take a long time but eventually you'll start realizing things that you like about yourself. Loving ourselves is hard, because we never spend time to learn how to.
June 4th, 2016 2:30pm
You should stop focusing on the negative part of yourself. We all have flaws, but it is important to focus on your strength and positive parts of yourself.
June 11th, 2016 7:05am
You hate yourself so much as you're focusing on " what you lacking and not what you packing." If you really knew how precious your life was and focused on the things you take for granted ;you would hate yourself a lot less. Focus. Focus on being positive. But if you still feel bad talk to a 7cups listener...we love you :)
June 12th, 2016 3:32pm
People only treat you based on how you treat yourself. If you feel poorly about yourself, others probably will too & you don't want that. Instead of focusing on your negative attributes, focus on the positive ones & how you make yourself & others happy.
June 12th, 2016 6:14pm
You should not hate yourself. It is probably the situations or circumstances that you are going through or have gone through that are causing these feelings toward yourself.
June 15th, 2016 10:08am
You should never hate yourself! You are wonderfully made and have so much to live for in your life! You might not like yourself right now, but things will be better
June 16th, 2016 1:34am
People tend to love those who they care for. The more you do for others the more you live them. By not taking care of yourself, it can cause you to not like yourself. Do things for yourself, start loving you
June 24th, 2016 5:01pm
Everyone has days where they feel as though they are underachieving. It's a natural part of the human life cycle. Maybe there are things you aren't feeling so positively about at the moment? Try and focus on the beautiful things about you. Every day, look in the mirror and say one thing you like about yourself.
June 30th, 2016 9:25pm
Because you don't know that you are a unique in this world. Please think about that and you can find yourself.
July 1st, 2016 12:23pm
I personally find that feeling comes from anxiety over not being accepted by others. If I think I am imperfect and don't meet the standards of others, that they will hate me, and therefore I should hate myself. Sometimes, the feeling comes from my own standards as well. I feel as though I have to live up to my own standards. However, "standards" are a social construct. Every human being is perfect the way they are. Not being smart enough, athletic enough, attractive enough, or anything like that, is all irrelevant. To stop myself from thinking like this, I try to think of good points about myself. Or, ask my friends/family members what they think of me.
July 2nd, 2016 7:45pm
It's common for people to think the worst of themselves. You could talk to therapist or a friend OR someone on 7 cups. Maybe it will be helpful.
July 5th, 2016 12:12am
You haven't learned to love yourself yet. You may have come through some recent bad experiences, these may be colouring how you view yourself. You may also be dealing with issues from your past for which you are unreasonably blaming yourself. Whichever it is, you haven't had the chance, opportunity or inclination to view yourself in a different light. As life goes on it's highly unlikely you will see yourself this way forever. As you grow you may find yourself moving away from these feelings. In the interim you might begin to train yourself to see yourself how others see you, no doubt it is in a far more positive light than you do.
July 8th, 2016 6:54pm
Well, if I hated myself or couldnt stop criticising myslef negatively, it would mean there is a chance that I am really sad or depressed but not necessarily it's that. But still I would consult an expert who will assess my behaviour and determine if it is depression, for being sure. That is if I hate myself for no reason or dont know what the reason is. There can be other reasons too. Often our parents put so much pressure on us for doing well in education and other things, we can really start to blame ourselves once we fail to satisfy our parents and they react badly. This can lead to self-hating and even self harm. Not only pressures from parents, even bullies at school, at times pressure from teachers can lead to it too. Mostly we hate ourselves for failing in things, for getting tempted and regreting later. Yeah, guilt can kill us inside. Mostly when we feel bad and guilty later for something we did and we fail to forgive ourselves, it makes us feel start to hate ourselves and often we think punishing ourself, self-harming will make us feel better. Even suddenly remembering about some things we regret can lead to this. Doesnt matter for what reason we start to hate ourself, we should seek for help right away when we realise what are doing.
July 9th, 2016 6:16pm
Maybe you're comparing yourself with others..or you're expecting more from yourself.. i would say.. that don't compare yourself with others.. be like a flower.. which blooms in its own way.. without being effect by other flowers.. and stop hating yourself for things you are not.. and start loving yourself for what you have.. and if you hate yourself then you couldn't expect any different from others.. so start giving yourself respect and love.. so people would do so too.. :)
July 9th, 2016 6:40pm
You may suffer from depression i recommend reading the 7 cups depression book so you will understand more of what your feeling.
July 13th, 2016 8:55am
'Cause you think that people hate you and that you can't do nothing. You have to work with your feelings and learn how to love yourself. I know you can do it.
July 15th, 2016 6:51am
You're very self-aware, and you are so very aware of the norms in your society. You know what is better, yet you don't feel that you've attained that ideal yet. So, you are hard on yourself, when you really need to be understood and sympathized with.
July 15th, 2016 5:21pm
Through out our lives, things happen that does not rest in our immediate memories. But we act as a result of all that we remember and do not immediately remember. Wat ever feelings u have for yoursefl can be sourced from within. You may be able to get to the root of your hate through therapy, hypnosis, or some time alone with yourself (among other ways). Every entity that breaths deserves true love.
July 20th, 2016 2:36am
It's likely another underlying issue. With anxiety/depression/other mental illnesses it's easy to do things you wouldn't approve of or be meaner before you stabilize, and it (the disorder/s) also destroy self worth. It's a matter of the thoughts running through your head as they influence your mood more than you think.
July 20th, 2016 6:54am
I used to hate myself so much because I didn't conform to society's standards of beauty. Instead of embracing my differences I retreated inwards.