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How to forgive yourself for cheating or lying?

305 Answers
Last Updated: 03/29/2020 at 1:25am
How to forgive yourself for cheating or lying?
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Courtney Cline, MS in Psychology and MS in criminal Justice

Counselor

I have 15 years exeperience in working with clients suffering from depression and substance abuse. I have worked with children and adults and believe in a holistic view.

Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
August 25th, 2016 6:03am
I tell someone about what I did, especially my mom, after venting out it feels amazing and forgiveness happens automatically.
VeeStarr
August 28th, 2016 11:25am
Sometimes we have to remember we are only human. We make mistakes. We're not perfect. What we do to come back from our mistake is what matters. Love yourself for who you are. Allow yourself to learn from your mistake and keep pushing forward.
Hope
August 28th, 2016 12:44pm
It can be hard to forgive yourself after such an event , but reminding yourself that you are after all a human and human beings do make mistakes in addition to that you can also do something self less for others that can put a smile on their face to remind yourself that you are still a nice person and that lying or cheating of yours cant remove the goodness in you.
Anonymous
August 31st, 2016 12:33am
Make a personal resolution to not repeat that behavior. Then make an honest, heartfelt apology to whoever you hurt. If they don't accept it, it's on them but at least you made a true attempt at resolving the issue.
Anonymous
September 2nd, 2016 12:43am
Tell the truth, weather it hurts it not. I personally believe it's the only right thing you can do.
blackstar
September 3rd, 2016 7:36am
You really can't, all you can do is try to move forward and hope your partner will stay along side with you. I cheated on my boyfriend, it was awful, I still feel awful. I probably will deep down for years. You hurt someone you have feelings for, it doesn't stop hurting you. Honestly, the best thing to do is to discuss with your partner the situation and hope they stay with you, and if they do, promise on your relationship that you won't ever do it again.
celerystacey
September 4th, 2016 9:23pm
You need to remember yourself in the times that you were an exceptionally generous and kind person.
Phillestertheangel
September 9th, 2016 10:55pm
You should really own up to it. For example: if you cheated on a school text and feel very bad about it, then tell your teacher. They will appreciate the honesty.
zenoz199
September 14th, 2016 2:47am
The number one thing to remember is that you're human. Humans make mistakes - vulnerability is what makes us human. Another key thing here is that by learning to forgive yourself you are ackowledging that what you did was wrong, thereby showing remorse and regret for your actions, which I believe warrants forgiveness - especially from yourself because you have learned from your actions.
Sollas
September 15th, 2016 2:03pm
I like to think that what has happened has happened and you cannot change the past. You can go forward only. You can spent time thinking about how you may have effected other people and learn form your mistakes.
Cito16
September 15th, 2016 5:34pm
Forgive and forget, no one is perfect. Maybe I'm right doesn't mean others is wrong. If we understand we will forgive.
Anonymous
September 22nd, 2016 1:24pm
You should think about the actions that you did and the effects you caused and try to avoid doing that so you wont cause again.
Anonymous
September 25th, 2016 6:12pm
I never tell one more lie and try to help people to forgive myself like helping my mother, helping my friend for her work. Or bring the negative things.
sugaryZebra77
September 29th, 2016 8:39am
Remind yourself that you're only human and we all make mistakes. Strive to not make the mistakes again but don't beat yourself up if it happens again. Just start the process over again.
Anonymous
October 1st, 2016 11:33am
Coming to turns can be difficult, the best step in forgiving yourself, is accepting that you will make mistakes but being willing to learn from them is what makes you better. Knownyour self worth, YOU are WORTH forgiving and loving again.
Anonymous
October 12th, 2016 4:17am
Promise to my self that I will never lie or cheating again, not now not ever. And start to move forward to something positively
Anonymous
October 14th, 2016 12:55pm
Everyone deserves a second chance. So do you. We learn from our mistakes. Just have to learn and move on.
LaughingOtter
October 20th, 2016 5:41am
Own up to the mistake is the best way. Look your self in the mirror and say yes I cheated or yes I lied. Or when confronted say yes I did that . I don't always believe the person needs to know. That is often hurting them to make yourself feel better. But if they suspect you or accuse you then own up to it. You did it then you are big enough to own up to it.
starrySunshine87
October 21st, 2016 3:03am
Remind yourself that no one is perfect. We all make mistakes. Continue to make the effort to change.
kindsoul129
October 21st, 2016 9:43am
We all make mistakes, it's part of being human. It's important to recognise that a mistake doesn't make you a bad person. If you've lied or cheated then ask your self what you've learned from doing these things and how will they affect what you do in the future. Part of showing ourselves compassion is being able to forgive ourselves the mistakes we make, accept we are human - we err but we learn and in that learning we become better human beings.
maskedshadow
October 22nd, 2016 8:50pm
remember that you are human and we all make mistakes maybe it was intentional, maybe it was unintentional but as long as we know that we have made a mistake and try to rectify it, we are on the right path
Anonymous
October 27th, 2016 8:07am
Well it depends on the person and it's honestly really hard but we can speak to people about the feelings and come up with plans
MessengerOfPeace01
October 27th, 2016 11:32am
Lying and/or cheating is something normal that everyone will experience, regardless of how it will happen. Forgiving yourself for something like that can happen only when you truly regret it and feel some change inside you that will force you to make up for it and build a strong wall of conviction that will protect you from doing it again.
Anonymous
October 29th, 2016 1:09am
Acknowledge, that these actions are solutions in your psyche. Search for the emotions and needs that made them necessary and ellaborate where they were coming from.
Anonymous
November 2nd, 2016 3:20pm
It will take time to forgive yourself. Also, appolagizing may give you some closure. Be genuine though!
fancyGrace43
November 3rd, 2016 5:44am
The only medicine for cheating pain is forgiving yourself. Learning from mistakes is important thing after forgiving - that is how you can grow as human being as it's best.
ElianaCares
November 5th, 2016 8:06am
Know that no one is perfect and everyone makes mistakes all the time. Guilt can drag us down and sometimes we just need to realize the mistakes we made. We are only human after all
Anonymous
November 5th, 2016 4:35pm
You can talk to the person you cheated or lied to about it and coming out or writing it down usually helps
wittygemrainbow8590
November 10th, 2016 2:59am
Forgiving yourself is a natural occurrence which will happen in time as you learn and blossom more and more as an individual, you will be more gentle with yourself and others as your grow to learn that everybody does things, we are human and after our actions or during we then progress feelings in our actions either in the present or future and we tend to reflect on them. just like as we may reflect on past hurts or feelings We learn from those and become stronger. There is no right or wrong everything we do is human, be gentle with yourself. :)
Scabby
November 10th, 2016 5:49pm
I believe it is hard to forgive yourself for some things. However, if it comes to cheating for example, you can only really start to forgive yourself once you've been honest with the person that you've cheated on. I Believe, you need to admit your errors, figure out how to avoid such problem happening again, and work on being forgiven. Often you will be forgiven by your partner if you demonstrate you are working on yourself and take the issue seriously. At the end of the day, you know if you are bettering yourself. when that time comes, the time to forgive yourself will come aswell. it is important to be honest with yourself. if you know (really know) you have learnt from your mistakes, and you are taking your mistake seriously, then you are on the right path. don't give up hope