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My boyfriend or girlfriend is embarrassed of me. What should I do?

263 Answers
Last Updated: 03/17/2021 at 1:29pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Deane Rain Marie, LMFT

Marriage & Family Therapist

I take a holistic approach in working with eating disorders, mood disorders, relationships, and the LGBTQ community. I use EMDR, Dreamwork, Stories, CBT and Cinema therapy.

Top Rated Answers
ashleypayne
November 11th, 2015 5:21am
Talk to them about it! Work things out and do not just let it hang in the air around you. Things will be okay I assure you :)
Birdmanhere
November 11th, 2015 6:56am
find out the reason behind that feeling first, then thing is it reasonable? yes- change it no- just leave because the further coming complications are heart breaking
MsgAFriend
November 11th, 2015 9:39am
You can ask him/her why they are embarrassed of you. And when u got the reason behind it, you can start working on the solution.
Anonymous
November 11th, 2015 10:16am
Try to let them know that you can't help who you are and will not pretend to be someone else just because of the opinion of others, your bf/gf is supposed to love you not who they want you to be.
Anonymous
November 11th, 2015 11:06am
Stay true to you, if he is embarassed, talk to him. Is there a habit you need to tone down? If it's you in general.... not the right guy for you
Leanyon777
November 11th, 2015 11:07am
try to understand the raison of that and trying to change if its possible or explain that its you and u cant change
Anonymous
November 11th, 2015 3:58pm
I would consider thinking if that is the best relationship for you because if someone cares for you they should not be ashamed of you in any way.
fancifulFlower65
November 11th, 2015 4:18pm
Nobody should be embarrassed of you. That could be something to be discussed, but nobody who doesn't treat you right, deserves you.
Anonymous
November 11th, 2015 4:27pm
First would be best to simply talk to him or her about it and if their reasons are shallow then it's best to surround yourself by more positive people and find a significant other that is proud to have you.
Precept
November 11th, 2015 5:27pm
It appears that your significant other and you may have some differences. Differences can be a healthy part of a relationship. However, both parties need to be in clear and mature communication about what the others expectations are. How comfortable do you feel on a scale of one to ten sitting down with your significant other and discussing what your concerns are?
musicalDew34
November 11th, 2015 6:34pm
Leave them immediately... u shouldnt be with someone whoe doesnt value your worth
MelissaT1970
November 11th, 2015 7:57pm
Ask yourself if that is really the kind of relationship you want to be in.Have an open, honest discussion with your boyfriend and discuss exactly what the problem is.
colorfulSunshine01
November 11th, 2015 9:52pm
honestly if im not embarrassed of my self then no one should be embarrassed of me i found out that most people reflect what they feel on other people so if that is their reaction towards you then most likely its a refection of them selves be happy with who you are and if they really love you then they will love you all in all ... hope this helps you it really related to me.
FabulousPotatoFreak007
November 11th, 2015 10:43pm
Personally, I would have just said end it; then I thought that's not actually solving anything. I would advise you to talk to them. Ask what's making them so uncomfortable. Don't hide it or run away, then might make things worse. Be upfront and confront. Don't be too upfront because that could come off as snobby. Try to deal with the situation nicely. Ask them when it started. Don't be afraid to tell them how this is making you feel. Hope this helped.
dreamwithmelovers31
November 12th, 2015 12:04am
leave their arse! your partner should never be ashamed or embarrased of you. you deserve to be loved
SydneyLouise
November 12th, 2015 12:30am
If your boyfriend or girlfriend is embarrassed of you, your relationship probably isn't the healthiest. I think you should talk to them and try and communicate what is going on for them to feel that way.
blackZebra81
November 12th, 2015 3:43am
If your partner is embarrassed of you it may be best to evaluate whether or not the relationship is worth staying in. Chances are if they fi nd you embarrassing than that means they do not like you as they thought. While this can be hard to cope with, it is best you resolve it now rather than later.
Davidblaine441
November 12th, 2015 8:41am
find a new partner, you should feel free to be yourself with your significant other, and if they feel embarrassed maybe they're not the right fit for you, take a step back to evaluate your relationship, dont jump to any conclusions. often change can be a good thing, but it should never come at the cost of you being you! there are other fish in the sea, so why not go for a swim?
sweetRainfall12
November 12th, 2015 9:20am
think about your those habits that made them embarrassed if those habits or your behavior is really bad then you should try to change it for the sake of your relation and if you find nothing wrong then you should think about the relation you are in. may be he/she is not the right person.
Warrio524
November 12th, 2015 11:58am
talk to her and find out what it is that embarasses her relationships are based upon compromise honesty and communicating clearly to one another but be willing to accept feedback even if it can be hard to hear many of the things we do and say affect people differently than we might anticipate and to help you learn to control those behaviors try having your partner remind you wish a word only you guys know what it means such as the word MIRROR in regards to reflecting on what behaviors are effective wether they e positive or negative
Anonymous
November 12th, 2015 8:36pm
You should talk to him or her and ask what is the problem. If they don't like to be seen in public with you, youtwo have some seirius problems. If after a talk you won't find a common way then..
Anonymous
November 13th, 2015 1:22am
Try to talk to them about it. They may not be, you're just putting things way out of proportion. If they are indeed embarrassed, ask them why, and if its a simple fix and you really love them, try to stop doing it. Maybe even ask them for help.
PRUNE4BEE
November 13th, 2015 8:49am
Don't allow them to get to you. Don't react. Have a side conversation and confront the issue they embarrassed you about
hcrriblekids17
November 13th, 2015 9:33am
I don't think anyone should think of their significant other in a negative way like that. I'd try and talk through it with them!
amazingRainfall28
November 13th, 2015 1:34pm
You deserve to be with someone who appreciates you for just being you. I think its important to evaluate the situation and ask yourself if a good friend was in the same situation, what would you advise them to do?
Anonymous
November 13th, 2015 3:00pm
With this, your partner seems embarrassed of you and you are being bothered by that. In any sense, have you talked to your partner about this?
joyousNature19
November 13th, 2015 3:12pm
Break up with them if they don't love you for you its not worth it no one should feel uncomfortable with there bestfriend
IsabelCoffee
November 13th, 2015 3:44pm
Have a conversation about it. Express how you are feeling, and why. And let them have the space to do the same. When you found out why your bf/gf is feeling that way you can work on a solution together.
Anonymous
November 13th, 2015 7:22pm
In a healthy relationship it is not right for either of the parties to feel so. You probably should talk to her/him about it and find out the cause of the embarrassment. If it is something simple you can try and adjust, adapt yourself. But if it is a large demand, you should try and explain to her and as your partner, it is necessary for them to embrace you as you come.
Manifestation
November 13th, 2015 9:35pm
Consider finding someone who will love you without conditions, terms or fear limits based on who you are in this life.