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How long does it take to get over someone?

392 Answers
Last Updated: 04/17/2021 at 9:03pm
How long does it take to get over someone?
★ This question about Breakups was starred by a moderator on 5/12/2016.
1 Tip to Feel Better
United Kingdom
Moderated by

Tanyia Hughes, Adv Dip Psy


I have been through a lot in life too, which helps me to be able to empathize with situations, thoughts and feelings that we have. Sometimes, it's not easy just being human.

Top Rated Answers
October 16th, 2014 3:28pm
It takes a long time trust me, if you truly loved him or her from you heart. If I say about my personal experience, it took over years. Feelings don't walk away easily. You will be fine. They say you should stop doing things for someone when you find out that it’s expected rather than appreciated. People have limits you know? And limits break too easily. You cannot keep putting everyone else’s life ahead of yours and think that it counts as love. Maybe it does, a little. But you’re the one who’s gonna get hurt in the end. Stop letting people take you for granted. If someone makes you miserable more than they make you happy, then it really doesn’t matter how much you love them, you just need to let them go. I know it’s gonna be really hard for you, since letting go isn’t really your thing. I know it’s gonna take courage, it’s gonna take a hell lotta courage for you to let go and walk away, but so did sticking around. And you handled that pretty well, didn’t you?
October 29th, 2014 1:22pm
I believe that you will never truly get over someone. You will always have that part that holds on to them, once apart of your life, always apart of your life. You just have learn to let things go a little bit. "If you love something, set it free. If it comes back to you, it's yours. If not, then it never was." If they end up not coming back to you, that's ok.
November 5th, 2014 8:24pm
Relationships have a half-life decay process just like radioactive material. Each one has a different half life. So if you are really into someone and the relationship ends, you'll feel bad for a while, then at some point you'll feel roughly half as bad, then after that same amount of time goes by again you'll feel half-again as bad, etc. The emotion never completely goes away but after a while it becomes so minor you rarely think about the person and when you do the thoughts are distant and happy.
December 17th, 2015 6:40pm
You are a person who has feelings, who cared deeply, who experienced the closest thing mortals have to magic, and there is nothing more OK than acknowledging that and mourning it...Now I know you want a timeframe for how long it’ll be until you’re done pining, but the truth is that nobody — no psychologist, advice columnist, therapist, couples counselor or 20-something writer on the Internet ;)— can give that to you. It’s not that simple. So, eventually, the deep sadness you feel as a result of this breakup will become subdued, almost unnoticeable — until it starts popping up unexpectedly. Be prepared for these unexpected moments, since you never know when exactly they’ll come. Maybe you watched a movie and there was a brief mention of his favorite sports team. Maybe a character in a book you’re reading shares his sister’s name. Maybe you’re wearing her favorite color today and you realize it halfway during lunch. And boom: The sad arrives. Have that go-to friend to vent to who won’t make you feel bad for “still” being upset. Keep your favorite snack stored in the back of your closet, ready to be eaten at a moment’s notice. Store your favorite wine in the fridge. Accumulate a playlist of funny YouTube videos to be watched when you need a gut-wrenching laugh.... Buy a really beautiful journal.... Never get to the bottom of your bank account because you never know if you have to splurge on a cute outfit in a moment’s notice. Over time, these unanticipated sad moments will pop up less and less frequently. One day — however many days, weeks, months or years later — you’ll wake up and realize you haven’t had one in a while. But if another comes, don’t beat yourself up about it. Cry if you have to. let it out....You'll be better for it....
November 16th, 2014 6:36am
There is no certain time. It could take you one month, three months, a year, 6 years, or a lifetime to truly get over someone. You could possibly even always have feelings for the person. BUT you must remember WHY it didn't work out. Don't dwell on the past. Learn from why the relationship wrong in order to continue forward, and find the one it will work out with. Life is to short to dwell and be sad over one person .
October 14th, 2014 2:58pm
It all depends on you. If you continue to surround yourself in the past you will find yourself stuck in it. To get over someone you have to look toward the future and and search for something better. If you really want to get over someone you will get over someone. It's gonna hurt at first but just like any cut or scrape it will heal. I like to tell people its not the end of the world its the end of a bad day.
January 7th, 2016 8:34am
it just take a few seconds my friend if one understands the importance of his life and of his own self. You just need to ask yourself how long you want to suffer because of someone else. Don't make your life so cheap that anyone can alter its happiness. if you have once left someone then why you are keeping dat person in your head. Can't you abide your own decisions. Don't you have control of .ur own mind. And one must understand that in life people and things come and go. You can't keep everything n everyone in your life for all the time. Don't depend your happiness upon others. take control of your happiness. Don't suffer my friend. There is God inside you don't make him suffer. It is the eternal happiness which is inside us. Then why are you suffering?...just because of ur mind manipulation....u know dat things n people come in our life but they can't stay for whole life. And if you know it then you should understand it n when u understand it all your suffering will go. We are the eternal happiness...God in living form...this universe is our own creation....enjoy it without getting attached to it...things n people always come and go.
September 22nd, 2014 7:56pm
14 days. It only takes 14 days to break a habit but it takes a little longer for a relationship. Its easy to say you don't care but how do you really feel inside
November 14th, 2014 11:01am
Its how fast you understand yourself after the much efforts you take to socialize and spice up your live new adventures, skills, hobbies. Breaking up is always an opportunity to empower yourself, The faster you do that the faster you get over with your ex.
July 1st, 2015 4:46pm
It depends upon how strong your bond was. sometimes you may think you're over someone but you may still have feelings and you may still miss them .
August 14th, 2015 3:06am
It is a very difficult question which is linked to a lot of the things from the relationship. Was it a long relationship? How close were you? Were you living together? In which way did you part? Nice or painful? I had a couple of one-night flings and they don't hurt much do they now? However when my girlfriend with who i was with 5 years under the same roof and planned to marry said to me she is moving to another country, i was devastated! For she was the blood and i was the veins... To answer your question, it depends of the depth of the bond you had with that one person. And sometimes it can take years. In my particular case, i will never get over my gf for i wanted to spend my life with her.
November 11th, 2014 8:10pm
It depends... :( It depends how long you knew the person and how close you were... It can be anywhere from 3 months to 10 years ... :(
April 4th, 2015 1:45pm
It varies for each individual. Sometimes we never get over them, we just move on because we have a life and have to succeed in it.
September 11th, 2014 11:06am
For me it was 6 months. Each individual is different, therefore, it will be different for each individual.
November 3rd, 2014 10:29am
I wish I could say that there is a definite time, but there isn't. You will only get over someone if you accept that it is over. It happens with time but the time depends on how strong you are and how adaptable you are. It is just like another change that you have to go through in your day to day life. But it will be tough until you accept the facts and move on!
November 9th, 2014 1:35am
It takes as long as you want it to take. You should always move in your own pace, even if it is hard. Though, keep in mind that you should never drown in your sorrows.
July 29th, 2015 4:12pm
Well for me it took 1.5 years. But then I made a lot of mistakes. I understood one thing, that the moment you get up, the moment you say that I will get over someone, your change mechanism starts ,you start to EVOLVE, yes Adapt against what was keeping you down, and trust me from that point there is no return , you will only go higher and higher towards Life & Beauty & Eternity.
February 27th, 2018 12:36am
That all depends on the type of relationship, everyone is different and getting over someone will take different time.
March 11th, 2015 3:10pm
Breakups are so personal and so variable cause there is no certain time. It could take a month,a year or a lifetime to truly get over someone. You could possibly even always have feelings for the person. BUT you must remember WHY it didn't work out. Don't dwell on the past. Learn from why the relationship wrong in order to continue forward, and find the one it will work out with. Life is to short to dwell and be sad over one person .
July 10th, 2015 7:05am
Sometimes we must undergo hardships, breakups, and narcissistic wounds, which shatter the flattering image that we had of ourselves, in order to discover two truths: that we are not who we thought we were; and that the loss of a cherished pleasure is not necessarily the loss of true happiness and well-being.
September 21st, 2014 9:57am
depends how long you were with them but it could take 3 weeks, a whole year or even your whole life just depends how close yous were and how long you were together for and how well you knew each other......
October 25th, 2014 9:00pm
There's no time limit, but what is guaranteed that it will be someday. When the time is right, you will get over them if you allow yourself to.
November 14th, 2014 3:42pm
In my own experience, getting over someone takes some months, maybe six months. This time is necessary to heal some injures caused by unhealthy relations. It's difficult because you give too much of you to someone you love.
March 6th, 2015 7:26pm
How long it takes to get over someone totally depends on the situation and also on you as a person. If you weren't that serious about the other person, you might find it pretty easy to get over someone quickly, but if the relationship was more important to you (or if you didn't want the relationship to end) it can take a really long time to get over. Hang in there and it gets easier with time!
April 11th, 2015 8:06pm
The amount of time it takes to get over someone varies, but the most honest answer I can give is that it takes a person the same amount of time it takes them to realize that they don't need someone to make them feel as beautiful as they truly are. :3
November 10th, 2014 8:53pm
There isn't a fixed period of time. Break ups are hurtful and any wound needs time to heal up. Don't rush it, live it.
August 16th, 2015 3:11pm
that depends on a lot of different factors. things like how long you were with the person, how intimate you were. whether you feel you had closure or not, your self esteem and sense of self worth. sometimes it takes a long time but the truth is. no matter how long it takes it will constantly become easier to deal with. each day will be a tiny bit easier to take.
August 8th, 2015 7:23pm
It takes a lot of time. Depends on how much do you love them. If it's real, it won't be temporary, it will last a long time. If it's just "by the way I love you" you will get over it pretty soon
July 10th, 2015 2:50am
There is no solid answer. Depending on the relationship, how it went, and what kind of person you are, it could range from a month to never. As someone who doesn't get close to people too much, having someone that I care about or maybe even love means it will be a lasting feeling for me. If you are an open person who connects more easily with people and has good friends to help you along the way, getting over someone can be made easier. Generally the longer the relationship went on the longer it will take to get over that person.
November 15th, 2014 2:51pm
It depends on how long you were into least that's what I gathered...and from experiences..