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How do I stop being judgemental?

302 Answers
Last Updated: 10/28/2020 at 12:18pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Andrea Tuck, LCPC

Licensed Professional Counselor

I tackle and discuss a multitude of social and emotional health issues. I have a belief that through empowerment and non-judgmental support clients' can thrive.

Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
July 6th, 2016 5:41pm
You can stop being judgmental by first looking at things or people positively. If you find yourself being judgy, then as yourself "do I want people thinking of me that way?"
CariHope15
July 6th, 2016 8:19pm
When you are about to judge someone think this: do I really have the right to be judging them? I don't even know their life or situation.
silverlemonade
July 7th, 2016 2:21pm
The first step is to realise that you are judging yourself being judgemental right now. Then, try to figure out why the need to stop being judgemental.
Abdou101
July 7th, 2016 5:11pm
“If we learn to open our hearts, anyone, including the people who drive us crazy, can be our teacher.” ~Pema Chodron Accept the others the way they are .. because thank god we're not the same ! we are all different from the personality to your physical form
Anonymous
July 9th, 2016 6:18pm
Think that you're not here to judge people.. and when you feel like judging yourself then you should start from yourself.. why to waste time judging others.. its your life.. you should spend in living in the moment rather than spending it on the people..
Anonymous
July 10th, 2016 2:37am
I stop being judgemental by being kind to others and appreciative and putting yourself in their shoes.
NumberEleven
July 10th, 2016 4:44pm
Place yourself in the other person's shoes. Imagine someone criticizing you for every little act, how does that make you feel? Remember that people have feelings too, and that these matter.
DrParkerListens
July 12th, 2016 5:01am
Growing up in an aristocratic society I was born being judgemental. But, as we experience life, we realize that there is more to people than the outer cover they wear. We learn that not everyone thinks, dresses, acts, looks, or lives life one specific way. We stop being judgemental when we start being more understanding.
helpfulsam99
July 14th, 2016 5:08am
It's human nature to make snap judgments. But when you find yourself being judgmental of someone, just pretend they're you. How would you feel if you knew someone else was having unkind thoughts about you? Probably not so great. So just try to think thoughts about other people that you would hope they'd think about you. And remember that everyone is human and has a story. In short, if you just try to use empathy and avoid dehumanizing people, that will help you to be a lot less judgmental.
TashHereToCare
July 14th, 2016 8:13pm
It is important to put yourself in the other person's shoes and think whether you would felt good being judged,
Anonymous
July 15th, 2016 2:14pm
View everyone with an open mind. Do not judge a person by their skin, sex, clothing or anything else. Until you know them personally, you will never know what they are truly like.
DrFriend
July 16th, 2016 2:42pm
You need to look yourself first. All the bad and the good things. Like there is no day without night we are not perfect. Learn acept yourself and others too.
Joner2016
July 20th, 2016 9:20pm
By judging ourselves once having a thought judging others. Looking our weaknesses and failures instead of thinking about other's.
Anonymous
July 21st, 2016 2:57am
Realize that you are no better than anyone. You have flaws, insecurities, secrets, you've made mistakes, people have laughed at you behind your back. Neither you, I, or anyone else has room to judge anyone. We're all in the same boat. Humble yourself.
Anonymous
July 22nd, 2016 6:28pm
Though there are many ways to stop being judgmental one of the most common is to picture yourself as the one being judged. Therefore, showing the fact that if you don't like to be judged neither does anyone else.
mkehelper
July 22nd, 2016 11:54pm
Become more aware of what triggers lead you to judge others. When you determine what these triggers are begin to challenge your judgments by asking yourself what actual evidence there is to back up this judgement and what evidence is lacking.
Alexisheretohelpyou2
July 23rd, 2016 10:15pm
Well, before judging, always realize there could be more that you don't know. If people first saw me, they'd think "why is she so week and emotional?" Or "She is being so selfish, her life is great!" But after I told you my little story, you'd get an idea why. Of course people can always be judgemental, but like you, all I can do it try. After taking into consideration that everyone has a story, it's important not to get mad, no matter how sad, or lame you think it is. Of course you can be judgemental in other ways to, but the best thing you can do is, just try not to be negative before knowing everything. But, even when you think you know everything about the situation, there's almost always more. Sorry, this is a hard question to answer.
softKoala37
July 23rd, 2016 10:48pm
Understand that other people might be self concious about whatever you're judging them about and they might not have much control over it. They might be going through something and you don't know. You also can't just take the chance and assume they probably aren't. Remembering that and remembering how it makes me feel when people assume theres nothing wrong with me or my friends stops me from being judgemental.
uniqueMango45
July 27th, 2016 1:08am
Understand that being judgmental will only do you harm in the long term. Quietly and internally judging people won't hurt anyone if you need to start that way, but being harsh like that to others has serious repercussions. A girl who was mean to me was extremely judgmental and ended up graduating and going to a less-awesome college because she was too busy being mean, and her boyfriend only considers her a bootycall since she won't talk emotionally/deeply with him without judgment.
narscef8797
July 27th, 2016 6:00pm
a person can refrain from being judgemental by putting themselves in another's shoes. only them will they truly understand.
COD
July 28th, 2016 10:39am
First, I think it might be good to begin asking why are you judgmental? Most often than not, we are judgmental because secretly, we think are or know the standard for what's right or wrong. We can be judgmental when others' values clash with ours. So it is good to find out why & what you are judgmental about & work on those areas.
Anonymous
July 28th, 2016 1:13pm
We are all judgemental, despite not realising it, but consider these prejudices may not be true. Just stop and take time to recollect.
ItsAlyssa
July 28th, 2016 10:32pm
Start by noticing it and trying to change by being nice by controling your opinion if you know it could hurt someone feelings
Anonymous
July 29th, 2016 7:20pm
Empathy. Empathy is powerful. Just imagine how you would feel if you were in there situation. See people for what they are rather than what they aren't.
JazlynAlmonte
July 30th, 2016 3:04am
Keep the judgements to yourself never tell it to people because it will hurt their feelings. Please keep it in your head
Melody293
August 4th, 2016 3:53pm
I think the best things to do to lesson how judgmental a person is, is to gently transform your thought. Like if you think something rude about a person, follow it up with something nice. It's natural to judge though.
GentleEar77
August 4th, 2016 9:20pm
First step is usually to stop being too harsh on yourself. People who demand perfection from themselves are usually people who judge others.
playfulSunshine38
August 6th, 2016 6:17am
Think of yourself as the other person. Put yourself in their shoes. Whenever you judge, try to stop for a moment and think "is it really worth it?"
Elta
August 7th, 2016 3:34pm
It's easy for us to make snap judgements, as it is how our brains are wired to do so. Our survival was based on quick judgement and execution, and this is a social holdover into today's times. What it takes is having an actively questioning mentality. Question the initial thoughts that are there, and challenge them with kindness. It takes time to get the hang of, but with practice it becomes almost as easy as making those judgements.
smilinEyes
August 14th, 2016 12:26am
I think first acknowledging that it's perfectly normal, and human to have judgements. What causes problems is when we start to believe our judgements are true, and we act according to those judgements. Every time I find myself judging someone else, especially in a negative light, I turn and look inward at myself - what is it about me that is not accepting of this person or behaviour or way of being? Is what this person is doing/being truly wrong, or is it a judgement passed down to me by my family, community or society? It's important to question why you're judging - and this can take some effort, but I find it always relieves the judgement and I can find common ground with the person I am judging.