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Why do people hate me for no reason?

330 Answers
Last Updated: 11/17/2020 at 9:11pm
Why do people hate me for no reason?
★ This question about Bullying was starred by a moderator on 5/12/2016.
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Jessica McDaniel, LPC, LCPC

Licensed Professional Counselor

I have been practicing cognitive behavioral psychotherapy since 2007 with a diverse group of adult clients with various diagnoses, all races, and socioeconomic classes.

Top Rated Answers
Shikamaru42
December 23rd, 2015 6:45pm
Well, that's sort of a self-answering question, isn't it? If there's no reason, there's no reason. However, there may be a reason only apparent to them. Most likely you affect their social milieu in a way that they don't like. Maybe they envy you for who you are or for the time you spend with their friends. Maybe they don't like your beliefs and how you influence people around them by living those beliefs. Or maybe they're just angry at you for doing something they dislike. There's a lot more possible reasons - when in doubt, just ask the respective person about it. I'm serious. Just talk to them in confidence - "I've been noticing some tension between us lately, which is sad because I hold nothing against you. Is there anything you want to tell me?". You'd be surprised how useful that can be. Oh, and make sure that if they open up to you, you stay calm, try to understand them, avoid overhasty judgement and thank them for sharing their thoughts with you.
BatWings89
December 26th, 2015 9:39am
For one your perception could be skewed. Are you finding that they either love or hate you? If they really do hate you there could be many reasons that have nothing to do with you. People tend to hate people who either display a similar trait they hate about themselves or just because you are different. You are you and you're okay that way.
sweetDew64
December 26th, 2015 5:38pm
I may come across as too forward at times. So some people may hate me and they don't know me that well
Anonymous
December 26th, 2015 11:57pm
sometimes people can overthink things and assume that people hate them. personally i use to be like that until i started to only care about what i thought about myself.
saltywhale
December 31st, 2015 2:14am
I believe that they hate you because you're mean but you don't know it or they hate you because they're mean.
Anonymous
December 31st, 2015 4:33pm
Not everyone hates you. Your family doesn't hate you, our your friends. You may just be thinking this because you aren't what you want to be.
Anonymous
December 31st, 2015 4:52pm
Do you think you did something wrong to think they hate you? Why do you think they hate you? How can you make it right so they won't hate you no more?
squeek
January 2nd, 2016 6:18pm
People hardly ever hate someone for no reason. they're just ashamed to admit the reason why they hate you
AbnormalAlex
January 3rd, 2016 5:02am
This may be brutally honest, but there might be a reason that you're not even aware of. I believe everyone gives off a certain energy, which can be negative or positive. If you find yourself consistently thinking negative thoughts about people's supposed hatred toward you, learn how to make them more positive, and you will come off as more welcoming and friendly.
AmazingAmz8
January 6th, 2016 9:40pm
It may feel that way but not everyone hates you for no reason. depression can make people feel like they live in their own little bubble and everyone around them is trying to pop it all of the time it isn't always like that.
SenpaiXD
January 7th, 2016 2:11am
First of all, do people really hate you for no apparent reason. Think about it, why would someone hate somebody for absolutely no reason. It is a negative and condescending thinking towards yourself. You are making an assumption on other people's thinking which may be true or not true about yourself. Secondly, if people do hate you? Its "What" do they hate about you, not why. I don't like you because you have bad hygiene. Okay I will fix and shower more and be a clean person from now on. I don't like you because you are too blunt and hurt my feelings. Okay I will hold back on the things I say and give constructive criticism at the appropriate things. In general, there is no why but what people hate about you. Even then you might be overthinking because people are selfish creatures. Most of the time, they will be too busy acknowledging themselves rather than you. Stay positive and improve yourself, you'll honestly feel better about yourself and give yourself a new perspective.
caringrose23
January 7th, 2016 4:11pm
Do they really have no reason? Think about it, we all blow up sometimes, maybe it just happened to be them that one time. Maybe they've heard rumors. Stand up for for yourself, it will give you more confidence and make you feel good.
Anonymous
January 9th, 2016 10:55am
They probably don't hate you. Maybe they are jealous or you just aren't friends with them but most of the time, they don't hate you
Anonymous
January 9th, 2016 6:23pm
May be because they judge you by your looks or any other external stuffs. People often makes silly mistakes, but if you are a nice person, it won't take much time to win them over.
gracefulPalm90
January 9th, 2016 7:41pm
Hatred is such a heavy word and can make people feel bad. How are people reacting to you? what are they saying? what is happening when these feelings occur. People are unique and are different and sometimes just not having a good understanding can make things seem not very nice. After all all people have very good qualities and can make good friends
Youregorgeous24
January 10th, 2016 3:59am
People dont hate you for no reason. People tend to judge too quickly. you areperfect in your own way
Anonymous
January 10th, 2016 10:09am
People don´t hate you they just want to get to you so they have more power. When you come here you are loved no matter what!
Anonymous
January 13th, 2016 5:56pm
Have they ever said to you that they hate you? it can be very easy to feel that someone hate you, but that doesn't mean that they actually hate you. But if they do there can be a lot of reasons and its best just to ask the person why.
MrEthical5241
January 27th, 2016 1:23pm
Everything has a reason. ( ^ _ ^ ) Maybe, you did something really successful or said something that has offended them. In my personal experience, We all will have people who will disagree with us in every steps we take. Example, Pizzas are part of balanced diet, No it's not or maybe it is. All we can do is ask why they hate us/you. ( ^ _ ^ )/
eternalHeart88
January 29th, 2016 5:42pm
they may be jealous of something you have that they do not have. is that a possibility? what do you think the reason you feel that way may be?
HazelEyes2
February 4th, 2016 8:47pm
Maybe they don't actually hate you. Maybe your view of yourself is so negative that you think people dislike you when they don't. It is an easy thing to do!
Rebekah
November 17th, 2020 7:32pm
I'm sorry to hear that you're feeling that way. It must be really frustrating. I've been in your position many times, it's a really difficult feeling to have. What makes you feel as though people hate you? Sometimes, we have beliefs that are very different from fact. There's a high chance that you're not hated at all (though of course, your thoughts and feelings are completely okay and 100% valid). Different types of people show how they feel in many different ways. They may offer certain feelings, moods, behaviours or emotions when they feel the complete opposite. Actions do speak louder than words. There's a chance that the person(s) who you think may hate you have had a bad week, are frustrated, stressed out, or have had issues with their family members, or maybe even issues with money. They may act out in the moment or say things that they regret. Social interactions are sometimes difficult for us, and we may think without our brains or hearts and act out of frustration. Jobs or studies may cause friction, as well as different families - negative feelings as a whole may contribute to others sending out signals of hate. If you'd like to try and find out if they actually hate you, you could try to talk to them - put effort and energy into finding out what's going on. Have a conversation with them, or video call them if you're comfortable; sometimes starting platonic relationships with those people could help to relieve feelings of hatred from them.
GoldenRuleJG
November 17th, 2020 9:11pm
Normally past memories of mistreatment from those in your life and how you interpret others verbal or non-verbal communication style can be dependent on whether or not you feel others hate you. Individuals ideas, plans and perception of boundaries conflicting with your own can create the impression that others don’t view you favourably and it’s also dependent on ability to take on opinions different from your own , as well as how you respond to differences. To raise self-esteem the first step would be to take it easy on yourself and practice mindfulness to resolve the solution of feeling disliked by others , reflect on whether or not your relationship with best friend has boundaries and time you two spend together resolving issues, meeting up. Importantly do not be afraid to answer questions to clear misunderstandings. People may not view you as you think. It could be one of those things also that this person is only being nice so that they can manipulate you but that is not always the case - do not let one bad experience encourage you to make generalisations.
DipityEnigma
June 6th, 2015 3:18am
As the saying goes "hater's gotta hate". Some people just feel hatred towards certain people. They maybe hate a person because they remind them of someone that they dislike and it could be a subconscious thing. Some people may hate someone because the person doesn't realise how annoying they're being or might be doing something that they don't realise people don't like. Sometimes, people simply hate because they feel like.
FT
June 10th, 2015 12:51am
Most of the time, how you perceive people feeling about you does not reflect on how things actually are. We are usually much more critical of ourselves than others. Remember, everyone has their own lives - usually hating other people, especially for no reason, is not something people have time for!
cellardoor1985
June 19th, 2015 1:36am
perhaps by possessing the mindset that everyone hates you, you have created a self-fulfilling prophecy and the negative energy you project makes people hesitant to be open around you
BrokenDefinition
June 19th, 2015 8:08am
In my experience we're much harder on ourselves than others. Many people we believe don't like us are just dealing with their own problems and may not know they're being hurtful.
laurence89
June 19th, 2015 1:51pm
Perhaps something about you reminds them of a bad experience or of a bad person that has done something cruel or bad to them in their life.
Hyachin
June 20th, 2015 11:53am
People hate you for a reason that you're not aware of. They may hate the way you talk, you walk etc. But, you can't let them invade you. If you think that you're doing nothing wrong to hurt them then just be yourself.
Anonymous
June 20th, 2015 5:16pm
It must be frustrated to feel that way. Hate is a pretty strong word though. What makes you feel like people around you hate you?