Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav

Why do I feel so unappreciated?

231 Answers
Last Updated: 06/12/2022 at 11:09am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United Kingdom
Moderated by

Lisa Meighan, MSc Psychology

Counselor

🌈 Welcome to 7 Cups :) I work using an eclectic style of psychotherapy and we work according to your goals, preferences and needs using evidence-based practices.

Top Rated Answers
helpfulSoul3
December 22nd, 2014 8:14pm
You may feel unappreciated because those around you don't seem to be showing you their gratification for things you are doing for them, but also, if you keep trying to please everyone, you may find that you start to become unhappy in yourself because you don't seem to be doing things for you, only for other people, and this may cause you to feel unappreciated because you are giving your all to everyone, and sometimes others just aren't the same as you.
KyleSmi93
December 22nd, 2014 5:15pm
The problem with the world is that most people are too self consumed to show anyone/anything appreciation. Your worth isn't judged by the medals, thank you's, or congratulations you receive. It's judged by your ability to see who you truly are. Do you feel as if you do what you can to help others/improve the world around you? Don't look for others for appreciation, you'll be disappointed most of the time. You're an amazing person, never forget that. Just remember the only person you need appreciation from, is yourself.
Anonymous
December 22nd, 2014 8:10pm
I feel unappreciated because people seem to expect more even when I am trying my best. It understand that sometimes you need to push to be better but sometimes it overwhelming and feel as I am going to crack
Vilechylde
December 22nd, 2014 8:24pm
Look at it this way; you are starting to understand your own worth if you feel that people aren't treating you right. Invert the negative feelings to positive ones, and start appreciating your own worth! If you are not satisfied with yourself, take steps to heighten your own worth. Once you as satisfied with yourself, you can move away from people who don't treat you for the jewel you are, because so long as you appreciate yourself, who the heck needs the opinions of others?
ColorfulCait
December 11th, 2015 2:44pm
I feel unappreciated because my boyfriend treats me poorly and he is always mad, so he doesnt care about the things I do even though he wants me to do them.
RisingWaves333
March 30th, 2016 8:29am
You may feel like no one cares for you,the way you do for them.You might feel like they take you for granted.Like they don't even do a bit of what you do for them.You always put others before you.You postpond what your work for others.But.why do you do that?Yeah being nice to others is good,but maybe you're forgetting to be nice to yourself! Maybe you are too nice.Maybe in your attempts to be nice,you've crossed the line and let your urge to please others take over.Sometimes, if we are too nice to others, we start expecting unreasonable amount niceness from others too.Everyone may not be as nice as you.This might make us to think that others are taking us for granted. It is time to make the recipe right by NOT mixing too much deference for others and enough hard headed pursuit of your own life!!! Just be yourself.The right people will love you the way you are.
Normaaeb
December 23rd, 2014 12:00am
Maybe because you don't feel supported by your family/friends. It's normal and it's something that everyone go through; just keep your head up and remember that there's nobody else like you
ongubsy
December 27th, 2015 9:46pm
one of the reason is you probably try to reach people. that is not right way. make yourself invisible and let them reach you.
lipsticklez
April 3rd, 2016 12:13am
You aren't getting the attention you would like with amount of work you put in maybe / don't do it anymore and see if things change
Anonymous
April 5th, 2015 11:20pm
The cold hard truth is that maybe you are. And the question is, do you want to be appreciated? Because if you do, then surround yourself by people that do appreciate you and can acknowledge what a wonder person you are.
fallingflowerpetals00
April 6th, 2016 1:00am
Your brain is playing tricks on you, depression commonly causes negative thoughts surrounding ourselves to take control and commonly unappreciated is one.
Arkelight
December 27th, 2014 9:57pm
Perhaps that's a question better suited for those around you. If you're performing well in work or at home and feel as though your colleagues or family aren't giving you enough recognition for this, then it might be a good idea to put yourself in their shoes and attempt to understand why this may be.
freshLight64
December 22nd, 2014 9:11pm
There could be a lot of reason depending on situations; If it's regarding with friends then maybe you are always giving and giving, but not receiving.
niceCupcake27
March 3rd, 2016 7:24pm
I feel unappreciated mostly when I try to help people and end up getting hurt along the way when all I was trying to do is help
BlackInk96
December 27th, 2015 10:24am
Because people can't appreciate you and your wonderful being. Sometimes is hard for people to understand and apprecuate you, but don't worry: there is always someone that will accept you and embrace your qualities
Nati24
December 10th, 2015 7:47pm
You might be around people who doesn't seem to show you the same kind of affection you do. Not on the same level, and that makes us feel unappreciated.
nlpinspiration
March 24th, 2016 7:57am
You feel unappreciated, because your beliefs force you to create that feelings. If you develop a self respect and positive thoughts about yourself than that feeling will get lost, and ultimately you will be proud of yourself
Mary497
June 10th, 2015 4:56am
When we are upset, or thinking negatively, often the bad aspects of our situations seem most prominent. Feelings of being unappreciated, or not cared about, often come to our attention, while more positive feelings can be suppressed unknowingly. This leaves the bad feelings to be focused on.
strawberryLake18
March 31st, 2016 6:18pm
maybe because you are always expecting something ; compliment ,reaction , price . In that case you have to do things just because you feel like doing it and expect nothing
Anonymous
March 18th, 2016 9:41am
Feelings of being unappreciated can come with an unpleasant /unwanted event , Sometimes being ignored and left out by others ( family and friends..) can result in its occurrence.Also mental disorders like anxiety and depression play a great role in producing that feeling .
Anonymous
December 16th, 2015 1:00pm
I can relate to this. I play offensive lineman in football and receive NO recognition. And in return, feel unappreciated. But when I realized the magnitude of the importance my job holds, I had a different perception. Maybe you feel unappreciated because you don't appreciate yourself?
PacificSunrise
February 25th, 2016 7:43pm
We feel unappreciated when we look to others for approval and for appreciation. Often times, these sources don't give us enough or in certain environment none at all. We also need to find out if we appreciate ourselves as well. The best source comes from ourselves. When we start to appreciate ourselves, we begin to value ourselves and lack of appreciation isn't a problem anymore. We will be like the sun which doesn't need to be appreciated to be a big ball of warm light.
uniquecreature41
November 18th, 2016 8:03pm
Perhaps because you are. If you're feeling like nobody recognises you for the work and effort you make then maybe you currently have a selection of people in your life that simply don't or won't appreciate you. If this is the case, it's time to start putting yourself first more often than you do. Don't be so available to everyone, withdraw some of that effort you make all the time. Start being selective; do what you can and not what you don't have to do. Make more time for yourself if possible. Where that isn't possible, treat yourself to something. Where that isn't feasible, start appreciating yourself. Don't work yourself into the ground for others; the term, 'what did your last slave die of' isn't in the lexicon for nothing! Ask yourself if you're spreading yourself too thin or doing more than you should for people who are taking advantage. People will start sitting up and paying attention of you start to take a step back. Nothing works more effectively than that. And it doesn't hurt for people to get a wake up call now and then and realise that you are not a doormat.
clh2os
December 17th, 2015 7:20am
Discover why it is you are doing certain things. Are you trying to help or assert unsolicited advice? Often when we do, we think we are helping, when it can cause more harm than good. Or are you going out of you way to do things you don't feel they are worth doing? When we extend our necks in areas that we aren't completely sold on, we expect more praise and acknowledgement. It obviously took alot more effort to do this task because I didn't really want to. This mentality can cloud our judgement. Or perhaps the person you are assisting may not be aware that they aren't demonstrating his or her gratitude. Open up a discussion, explain how you are feeling and why--perhaps it can give you both insight to each others actions.
Anonymous
March 10th, 2016 4:26pm
Perhaps, you are not noticing the people around you that do appreciate you. You are too blinded by your negative thoughts to see that they really love you and care for you.
Anonymous
March 24th, 2016 12:43pm
Often we never tell people just how we appreciate them and we need to hear it from time to time it's natural to feel this way at times
Anonymous
December 31st, 2015 11:39pm
Often, others are not vocal about their feelings, which can lead us to feel like they don't notice.
charmingGrace72
April 1st, 2016 3:57pm
I tend to think that feeling unappreciated stems to the fact that you're spending time with people who don't give to you the support and love you are looking for. Having a conversation with those around you that you feel are not appreciating you might be the way to start. It could be that these people don't even know what they're doing. And it's worth trying so you don't feel terribly about yourself on a regular basis.
gracefulHeart44
March 30th, 2016 4:02pm
Sometimes when we are upset we see things in black and white. Either they appreciate you or they don't appreciate you. Depression can make everything feel a lot different then when you aren't depressed.
HotChocolate2
June 21st, 2019 4:38am
The reason you feel unappreciated may come from you not appreciating yourself. After all, it’s hard to feel appreciated when you don’t even love yourself! I think self-love, self-care, and self-awareness is very important. A lot of people feel like their insecurities stem from external factors (like how much they’re loved or how much people appreciate them) when actually it’s all internal (i.e. how much they FEEL loved or how much they FEEL appreciated). That means that true feelings of fulfillment and satisfaction can only come from yourself. Don’t be ashamed of giving yourself compliments and pep talks! It does wonders for your mental health.