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How can I stop being insecure in my relationship?

259 Answers
Last Updated: 02/23/2021 at 7:24pm
How can I stop being insecure in my relationship?
★ This question about Relationship Stress was starred by a moderator on 5/12/2016.
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Lauren Abasheva, LMHC

Licensed Professional Counselor

A sex positive, and kink knowledgeable therapist with an open mindset and a clear understanding that we are all different.

Top Rated Answers
June 20th, 2015 9:54am
It only stops when you decide it. When you do, everything will be much clearer than what you think it is. "Insecure" is fear of being fooled, or left out. Be dependent on no one. A person who needs no one is powerful.
June 20th, 2015 2:18pm
It's one of those things that are very often different for every person. At times it can be cause of an unhealthy relationship, because of either personal problems or how the other person is doing themselves, or even sometimes incompatibility with each other, etc. It's very important that whenever you feel that you need help and you don't know where to go, to contact any listener out there, especially for problems like these in which are very much so different for everyone. We all care for you and are here for you!
June 20th, 2015 4:18pm
Being insecure in a relationship isn't much of a bad thing really as long as it doesn't last for too long. It helps you actually build stronger ties as you're under some sort of stress. It happens to everyone near the beginning of their relationship. But if you feel that you're 'over-insecure', then you probably should talk about all your doubts and insecurities with your partner. Though I would recommend you sitting down and reflecting on your insecurities, and ask yourself if they are justified, can they be improved, or are they really a hindrance to your relationship or you're just afraid pointlessly.
June 20th, 2015 6:33pm
so there are insecurities being experienced by yourself in your relationship, yet you are realising these are insecurities and would like to know how to stop them?
June 21st, 2015 12:09am
Encourage openness and discuss calmly together what aspects you are both happy and unhappy with, and constructively criticise- for example, if you don't like your partner's 'hat', suggest a different 'hat', this will allow them understanding of your issue, but also points them in the direction of a happy medium where they are able to be happy, but can now make you happy too.
June 21st, 2015 5:22am
It is always important to communicate your feelings to your partner in a relationship. Telling your partner how you feel can help you feel more secure and comfortable in your relationship.
June 21st, 2015 1:38pm
As with nearly all relationship issues, COMMUNICATION IS KEY TO SUCCESS. Hold a casual (or formal, if you like) discussion with your lover about your insecurities and figure out why you feel that way. If you already know why you feel insecure, then talk with your lover about how you can improve your situation together. Bonding activities such as spending more time together and hearing your lover say reassuring words helps very much. Source(s): Personal Experience.
June 21st, 2015 4:16pm
just believe in yourself because if you cant trust your own relationship with the person you like how can u expect other to?
June 21st, 2015 7:40pm
you need to understand the person is with you because they love you. you need to understand you are also in control of your actions in the relationship, and have the right to consent or refuse certain actions your partner desires you to engage in.
June 22nd, 2015 7:58pm
Make some time for your partner and make sure you are completely honest with your partner. Explain why you feel insecure and if they care they will show you that you have nothing to worry about. It may even bring you two closer with this interaction.
June 24th, 2015 12:55am
Be yourself, clarifies all your doubts and relax!!! be happy with yourself to be happy with someone else.
June 24th, 2015 7:45am
Just be confident in who you are and learn to trust your partner but not blindly. Don't hesitate to clarify your doubts either.
June 24th, 2015 10:58am
Realise that whoever you are in a relationship with is with you for a reason. They could be with anyone else .. But they chose you, and they love you.
June 24th, 2015 4:15pm
The more you love yourself, the little you have to worry about insecurities.Everything starts with u
June 24th, 2015 8:10pm
Think positive and be self assured. Do not define myself by my relationship. Be an individual outside of my relationship.
June 25th, 2015 2:54am
It is important to become a stronger more confident you and your partner will greatly appreciate this.
June 25th, 2015 6:17am
Talk it out with your partner and communicate everything! Communication is essential in a relationship, just as essential as trust, because you need communication to trust!
June 25th, 2015 7:06am
Appreciate the things you already have and try not to look for the things your relationship doesn't have.
June 25th, 2015 5:58pm
Overcoming insecurity is a process, but it begins with you. It begins with positive self-talk and telling yourself that you are worth it, because you ARE worth it and your significant other thinks so too.
June 25th, 2015 6:05pm
Trust. Trust is one key in a relationship. If you don't have trust work towards it and talk with your significant other.
June 26th, 2015 1:55am
Insecurity is challenging; however, you can begin b acknowledging why you feel insecure. You can also discuss your concerns calmly with your partner.
June 26th, 2015 8:54am
June 26th, 2015 2:26pm
By being honest with yourself, and knowing who you are, you won't find the need to feel insecure. Self-acceptance, my friend.
June 26th, 2015 6:54pm
Establish trust between you and your partner by asking them their thoughts about the relationship, how you can improve, and what they would like to do. Likewise you should ask them similar questions to determine the status of the relationship as healthy, meeting the status quo, in need of improvement or requiring a breakup.
June 26th, 2015 9:23pm
i think, your partner wouldnt be in a relationship with you if he didnt loved you just keep that in your mind, tell him about your feelings.
June 26th, 2015 11:43pm
I believe so, yes. You never know who is out there for you. Being single can be a time for a person to reflect on how they feel about themselves and others. I think being single is a dedication to yourself and your feelings. I know the feeling of being single forever. Once you dedicate time to yourself and growing, things will fall into place.
June 27th, 2015 7:36am
I've personally found that trust and communication can really go a long way in a good relationship.
June 27th, 2015 12:36pm
If you feel insecure in a relationship, you have to have a conversation with the person you love, and tell that person why you feel that way. Like that, the person will help you and talk to you, calming you down. You have to be truly yourself to him/her.
June 27th, 2015 3:44pm
يمكنني التغلب على كل المشاكل النفسية , بأستخدام التفكير المنطقي , وجعل الهدف في الحياة ليس العيش فقط , و إنما اكثر من ذلك ..
June 28th, 2015 12:21am
Have confidence in yourself and your partner, and think realistically - about the positives and negatives, and the positives in the negatives