...See moreHi community! It's been a while since we had a check-in so here goes.
[Image Description: Moon photographs!]
1. How have you been doing?
2. What has been taking up a significant amount of your time, energy and resources or something in the near past or future? How have you been feeling about that?
3. Share any song that has been making you feel strongly? ✨
If you prefer not to answer any or all of these questions, feel free to share anything that has been on your mind or just say hi if you would like that! Feel free to also interact with others in the replies unless they want otherwise. Looking forward to hear from you.
Add/Remove yourself from our community taglist (to be used for check-ins, discussions, events and announcements) here [https://www.7cups.com/forum/SupportPlus_205/WelcomeIntroduceYourselfHere_270/SupportPlusOfficialTagListPost_252146/].
...See moreAre you a member considering becoming a listener but not very sure? Read on, this post is for you!
Questions to Ask to Yourself
Am I currently stable enough to be able to support someone?
Do I have good boundaries?
Am I able to show patience in trying to understand someone?
Do I genuinely care and look to be kind and empathetic?
Am I good at self-care?
Am I willing to learn and grow in my active listening skills?
Am I aware of cups/compassion fever?
Let's treat all the above questions one by one!
1. Am I currently stable enough to be able to support someone?
Each of us has some struggles, but if you are balanced enough you could be good to listen and support someone❤️ If you are unbalanced and struggling too much in your days, then you won't be able to give off calm and compassionate vibes to the member required for making the member feel better.
2. Do I have good boundaries?
You need to have the ability to say 'no'. When a chat topic triggers you, or a chat feels uncomfortable/unproductive, you need to be able to say to the member in a polite and firm way that you won't be able to support them on the topic. You may assure the member that it has nothing to do with them but about your comfort level as a listener. If a member disrespects your boundaries despite you reminding them 2/3 times about it, you need to end the chat with them and block them as last resort. If you are willing to develop strong boundaries, you could be a good fit for becoming a listener!
3. Am I able to show patience in trying to understand someone?
Understanding someone not only requires your time but your patient listening to their story as they vent bit by bit to you. Members take time to open up and thus it is required of the listener to be patiently allowing the member a compassionate space where they may begin to open up to you. This would require not interrupting them while they are trying to tell you something, letting them know you are there by short supportive phrases, asking relevant open-ended questions for them to feel guided in sharing their story with you, not giving advice and rather helping them explore their options and sort their mind, etc. If you feel you could show or develop that patience, becoming a listener could be right for you!
4. Do I genuinely care and look to be kind and empathetic?
This is a very important question! Not everyone feels a natural inclination to help and support another. If you feel genuine care towards other people's struggles, feel good to say kind and supportive responses, and look to imagine yourself in their situation to better understand their struggle, you could be a good fit for becoming a listener.
5. Am I good at self-care?
Do you look to be patient, kind, and supportive to your own self? If yes, you may be able to be the same for someone else too!
6. Am I willing to learn and grow in my active listening skills?
A listener's journey is a learner's journey. If you could see each chat as a learning experience, get help from a listener mentor when needed, access the listener support room for asking questions, are willing to take up active listening tests and quizzes, and are quite simply a humble learner, then you could be a very good fit for becoming a listener.
7. Am I aware of cups/compassion fever?
It could easily happen that a listener spends excessive time at 7cups, in a way that negatively affects their health and their offline life. Given the compassionate community we are, one could easily forget their off-screen life and forget the real world. If you are someone who looks to discipline oneself in terms of the time you spend at 7cups, you could make a good listener.
Hope this helps in helping you decide about becoming a listener. If you feel you are ready to become one, become a volunteer listener [https://www.7cups.com/listener/become-a-volunteer-listener.php] today!
...See moreI am new, I'm really not sure how this works
I am 21, non binary & queer. (they/them)
I have recently found out I am Autistic.
Just looking for general support and acceptance I guess, a sense of community and belonging maybe.
Hope everyone has a nice day
...See moreHow can volunteering benefit a volunteer? Share with us by replying to the thread! To help you think, we've listed a few benefits of volunteering below!
#1: Volunteering increases your social and relationship skills
One of the best ways to make new friends and strengthen existing relationships is to commit to a shared activity together.
Volunteering gives you the opportunity to practice and develop your social skills since you are meeting regularly with a group of people with common interests. Once you have momentum, it’s easier to branch out and make more friends and contacts.
#2: Volunteering increases self-confidence
Volunteering can provide a healthy boost to your self-confidence, self-esteem, and life satisfaction.
#3: Volunteering combats depression
A key risk factor for depression is social isolation. Volunteering keeps you in regular contact with others and helps you develop a solid support system, which in turn protects you against stress and depression when you’re going through challenging times.
#4: Volunteering can advance your career
If you’re considering a new career, volunteering can help you get experience in your area of interest and meet people in the field.
Even if you’re not planning on changing careers, volunteering gives you the opportunity to practice important skills used in the workplace, such as teamwork, communication, problem-solving, project planning, task management, and organization. You might feel more comfortable stretching your wings at work once you’ve honed these skills in a volunteer position first.
#5: Develops emotional stability
Depression, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, low self-esteem, and even Obsessive Compulsive Disorder have all been helped by volunteering. When people with OCD, PTSD, or anger management issues volunteer, they feel more connected to others. They have an increased sense of purpose. Connection and meaning translate to decreased symptoms and improved social function.
#6: Burns that stubborn belly fat
When we volunteer, even if it is not a physically demanding project, we still get up and get moving.
#7: Volunteer gains a sense of purpose and becomes happier
How you may ask?
Throughout your life, you look to develop social and professional skills that promote your personal achievement. Using those skills for a wider, communal impact can be even more fulfilling. Volunteering will enrich your life and give you a broader purpose and can give you a boost of motivation.
We are lucky to be on 7cups which provides as simple a volunteering activity as being an active listener to someone. You just need to hold yourself back and give a safe and compassionate space for the member to vent to you. There are easy-to-practice active listening skills such as validating emotions, asking open-ended questions, and showing understanding and empathy.
If you are a member and considering volunteering on 7cups, read this post about becoming a listener [https://www.7cups.com/forum/NewbieHub_27/QuestionsInformationaboutusing7Cups_792/BecomingaListener_281431/].
If you are a listener and want to get better at listening, it could be worth walking the listener learner growth path [https://www.7cups.com/path/playlist/listener-learner/].
...See moreLets play take one, keep one!
There are two words. In order to take a turn, you change one word, and keep the other!
John: Apple Car
Andrew: Fast Car
Ethan: Fast Airplane
Lauren: Fast Spaceship
And so on!
...See moreWe are constantly sending each other bid for connection, regardless of the motivation.
Perhaps it's a stranger who made an effort to look up and smile at you?
Someone who took time to text/ call to ask how you're doing?
Someone who suddenly talks about random stuff, maybe?
Perhaps a listener or a member who reaches out and says hi?
All graphics posted for August's event: Pinterest
Sometimes we are aware yet for some reason we dismiss it. More often we're unaware and unintentionally dismiss that bid for connection.
Can you recall anyone sent a bid for connection recently? How did you respond and why?
Is it possible that a snap, an anger, a complaint or a withdrawal is a form of bid for connection? Why or why not?
Challenge! A virtual social experiment: send a text to a random listener/ member just wishing them a good day/ evening or simply send a flower or heart. To random person that you have never interacted with before. If you take the challenge, how did it go?
After participating, please submit THIS FORM [https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfgMD8G3uw7b4F80AWmIR0Ko72yo2-bgfgXPP92GfoGj0InOg/viewform] to track your participation towards a seasonal badge!
...See moreThis post is dedicated to welcoming members. If you are a listener, please show support to the members who post here! Listeners can introduce themselves here. [https://www.7cups.com/forum/NewbieHub_27/WelcomeIntroductionsto7Cups_1163/Welcometo7CupsIntroduceyourselfHere_225605/]
Hi there! We are so excited you joined 7 Cups! Allow us to welcome you by posting in this thread!
Please tell us why you are here and what topic are you seeking support for?
How can we best support you?
Here is a resource you may find helpful: Find Welcome Pack here! [https://www.7cups.com/forum/GroupSupport_168/CommunityManagersOffice_2008/Introducing7CupsWelcomePackMembersListeners_238986/]
Practice compassion and empathy for yourself and others. Also, on successful completion, get a chance to earn a shiny badge known as "Compassion Hero". Open Here! [https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLScMEXP6lopKu4ZJAtmctmwk0vq9Fp7T892gWJteqmQoIJa_Dg/viewform]
edited by ASilentObserver as of Feb 17, 2021
...See moreI can’t stand the way I look at all. I can’t look in the mirror most of the time because all I see is someone who I consider really ugly and childish and lonely. I don’t like my square shaped face, I don’t like my frizzy hair, I don’t like my thin lips.
Every time I see my friends post on Instagram I want to cry. They look so pretty and i feel like im choked by jealousy as I want to look like them so bad I end up muting their posts or else I’ll end up crying myself to sleep for days.
I don’t take photos of myself bcos I feel like it’s embarrassing and I look bad in all of them. I don’t like my smile at all. I recently got my hair cut into a wolf cut and though others say I look pretty with it I feel like they’re lying to make me feel better. I feel like it barely helps. My other friend also got a wolf cut and the glow up was insane. Once again, I felt so jealous.
I hate feeling this way. I don’t want to be that jealous of my friends, it’s unfair to them. The worst part is, for things like my lips, I never thought that they were bad before, as my mum had always told me they were pretty, and shaped like a ribbon/ heart. But on TikTok, there was a trend a little while ago where people would put on a filter that thinned their lips and then take it off, and be like “woah I’m so happy I don’t have thin lips! Look at my pretty big lips!” And then I became insecure over them.
I also don’t dare to dress up in the style I want as I don’t feel like I’ll pull it off. All my friends have been told they’re pretty in the streets and that has never happened to me once. I feel terrible over that and I’ve begun to even wish I’d be catcalled to at least feel like I’m pretty.
I don’t know how to stop feeling this way. I feel this way 90% of the time, save for the 10%, which is like 1 week where I feel confident, or better, but it always goes away. I wish I was pretty. I wish I FELT like I was pretty.